1. Life is a lot like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.

2. I always wondered why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger as it got closer. Then it hit me.

3. I asked the gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits. He replied, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make it on Tuesdays."

4. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down!

5. Why don't some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don't work out.

6. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

7. The secret to a happy marriage is a sense of humor and a short memory.

8. You know you're clumsy when you can trip over a cordless phone.

9. I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.

10. My computer suddenly started singing "I Will Survive." Turns out it had a virus.

11. The shortest distance between two points is under construction.

12. I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

13. If at first, you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

14. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

15. I told my boss I needed a raise because of inflation. He said, "Sure, your salary will now be inflated!"

16. Don't trust atoms. They make up everything!

17. I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.

18. My doctor told me I need to watch my drinking. So now I drink in front of a mirror.

19. A clean house is a sign of a wasted life.

20. My wife told me I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.

21. I'm reading a book about reverse psychology. Don't buy it, it's terrible!

Laughing is the best medicine, and these funny thoughts are sure to bring joy to your day. Share them with your friends and spread the laughter!